Party Politics

So, Mo Mo is going to be 3 very soon. I booked a large venue for a party. However, the more I have thought about it, the more I've decided against the idea. Mainly, I think because Mo Mo is going to be 3. I think it would be perfect if she was 6 or 7 and chose her own friends. But, I was finding it so hard to decide who to invite. On my list were all of my friends and their kids of varying ages. Then, because the venue was large, I was thinking of other people to invite just to make up numbers. The further down the line it got, the further I felt it moved away from what my little girl really wants which is this:
1. To be Cinderella.
2. To have a tea party.
3. For Daddy to be a pirate and Mummy and Bee to be princesses!

If this is what will truly make her happy (and lets face it, she changes her mind when the wind changes direction), then what am I doing??? Were we having the party for us or for Mo Mo? So, I have cancelled the venue which is fine, because I haven't told her I booked it, or invited anybody yet. Mo Mo doesn't have a huge amount of friends at the moment-  she has a handful who she sees regularly and these are not really of her own choosing. They are relationships based on my friendships with other mums and our kids are thrown into the mix. So, instead, we are heading off to the Lakes for the weekend as a family where we can have our own special tea party and we are also going to go for a girly outing to an ice cream parlour to stuff our faces!

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Mo Mo is just venturing into the world of making her own friends since she has started pre-school. Most experts agree that children start to form their own relationships around the age of 3. It got me thinking- how do you explain what friendship is? It's taken me this long (thirty- ahem- something years) to realise that there are true friends who stick by you forever and those who are transitional, depending on what's going on in your life at the time. A bit of research led me to this:- "Aristotle provides us with one of the great discussions of friendship. He distinguishes between what he believes to be genuine friendships and two other forms: one based on mutual usefulness, the other on pleasure. These two forms only last for as long as there is utility and pleasure involved, whereas genuine friendship does not dissolve. It takes place between good men: 'each alike wish good for the other qua good, and they are good in themselves'. Aristotle continues, 'And it is those who desire the good of their friends for the friends’ sake that are most truly friends, because each loves the other for what he is, and not for any incidental quality' (Aristotle 1976: 263)." ( Perhaps a bit wordy for an almost 3 year old!

Anyway, here's an interesting article on the Politics Of Kids' Birthday Parties.

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